Daily Joke: My wife just found out I replaced our bed with a trampoline; she hit the roof.

Daily Joke: I like to hold hands at the movies… which always seems to startle strangers.

Daily Joke: I had a neck brace fitted years ago and I’ve never looked back since.

Daily Joke: I woke up this morning and forgot which side the sun rises from, then it dawned on me.

Daily Joke: I’m on a whiskey diet – I’ve lost three days already.

Daily Joke: As I watched the dog chasing his tail I thought “Dogs are easily amused”, then I realised I was watching the dog chasing his tail.

Daily Joke: To the man on crutches, dressed in camouflage, who stole my wallet – you can hide, but you can’t run.

Daily Joke: I had an argument with one of the seven dwarfs. He wasn’t happy.